Precious Hands ~ Recognising Sexuality (Revised Edition)

LGBTQ

WRITTEN IN October 2013, it is dedicated to a friend - one who understands, has been there, has come through, and now shines as an international example to all - this image being sent to me in 2013 with the enigmatic enquiry as to how it might, perhaps, portray sexuality.

I sat down, I did not need to think. I allowed thoughts to flow through the ink on the page.

The poem is set against the background of the soundtrack of The End of All Things by Howard Shore.

The Title deliberately carries the noun 'Precious' because that, in his language, is the meaning of his name, and with the poem an indelible imprint upon that man's life, his current and future work, and contribution to society as a whole, this was the natural thing to do.

Monday, October 14, 2013pm

IBM

Bild zur Verfügung gestellt Mit freundlicher Genehmigung eines Freundes in Berlin, Deutschland (2013)

 Precious Hands : Recognising Sexuality

I

I have a thousand voices

raging in my head,

telling me I am what they

want me to be.

I do not understand

their contention with me,

their belligerence,

their hostility.

A thousand hands

attempt to pull me this way and that …

No, here

No, there

No, down here

No, up there

NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

II

Don’t you DARE attempt

to live the man you really are!

You are deluded!

We forbid it!!

You have spent too much time

with Grandmama.

You need to mix with girls!!!

'Come with us'

the voices scream.

III

The Voice of Reason whispers…

The strident rebellion

shouts back from demented beings …

Or is it just the image I've been

fed,

of a nether world,

to frighten me into acquiescence?

A nether world, moreover,

that simply does not exist …

IV

What?

You think we are not real?

We live inside you!

We harbour you!

You are our resting place!

We will give you an easy time

if you will but give up these

masculine notions … …

nay, these feminine notions, others scream

that emasculates your masculinity;

If you will but acknowledge us

we will leave you in peace.

V

The hands clasped ever tighter

Grappling,

Gripping,

Clawing,

Tearing …

A myriad voices …

‘we will not permit this man

his true inner feelings’

We insist on a man being at war

within himself,

That we break him down,

and he becomes ours…

VI

The lofty proclamation from a thousand mouths

of self-righteous indignation:

‘He is an abomination in the eyes of the LO… …

... OBLIVION ... !!

VII

Darkness retreated before the Light,

Sudden ~ Glorious ~ Victorious

flooding every part of my being.

Hands clasped me,

Warmed me,

Comforted me,

Consoled me.

Myriad hands guided me

Each hand both

of cleansing fire,

of the coolness

of a mountain stream.

The softness of flesh

Dry, clean,

Yes, cleansing my body,

Healing the stripes and welts

and the rips in my skin,

Wounds healed over.

A Shimmering Glow before me

An Image

Not seen directly,

Yet, out of the corner of my eye

the form of a Being!

A million colours,

A Constellation of Rainbows

in many dimensions

soothing my soul,

At peace with my spirit

A thousand strings in unison.

A Voice, the sound of many waters:

You are as I made you

And as I intended you to be.

Let no man, no woman tell you otherwise.

It is my desire you love woman and man

in equal measure.

I create each of you in My Image.

And if perchance I see it good

That you should love a man, your own kind

Or that you should love a woman, your own kind

Or that each should love either,

Then so be it …

I think it, and it is done.

I do not give My time to

misinterpretation of My Word.

I ignore the words placed in My Mouth

by people, I have created,

who decide they know better than Me

their Creator ~ the I AM

These hands upon you now are

All the aspects of your personality

and character that I have given you,

male, female. female, male.

They have come home

I held them back a while,

that you might find your true self.

To be as I intend you to be

Beautiful, charismatic, gentle,

Loving, giving

For I AM WHO I AM ~ Yud Hey Vav Hey ~ אני מי שאני

I Am the Eternal Self-Existing One

Outside time

And beyond comprehension

to most, indeed, all

who prefer I be in their image

Rather than they, Mine …

Learn that distinction

and it will serve you well

You have seen an aspect of My Deity

and, like these hands,

In the course of your long life,

You will see Me in many other forms

And never in the form, you expect.

I go now but I AM with you 

I AM in you 

I AM Love divine

My love excels in your love-making

And you will touch the hearts of many 

VIII

These hands have never left me.

They are with me in the Midnight hour,

At Twilight,

At the break of day.

They comfort me.

I am at peace with myself,

I am who I am,

I am what I am,

I love a man

A man loves me,

I love a woman

A woman loves me,

I am natural,

I am normal,

We are natural,

We are normal,

Each created in His Image

And He rejoices at our sexuality.

I rejoice too, we rejoice, you do too,

And so should you over there on

the outer fringes wrestling with

screaming voices and clawing hands.

We rejoice in our own sexuality

June 28, 2022
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LIVERPOOL


© 2022 Ian Bradley Marshall

Originally composed on 15 October 2013